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The Tentacle


October 31, 2003

Message To Illegal Aliens: Hit The Road!

Bethany Stevenson

Illegal aliens are in the papers everywhere. They're everywhere! They're everywhere!

AP: "Wal-Mart is raided; illegal aliens captured"

Frederick News Post: "Maryland DMV to refuse licenses to illegal aliens"

Local Fred Neck "I can't go into a fast food restaurant and order without an illegal alien behind the counter who can't understand I want a hot dog and soda."

It is like a conspiracy to get rid of them or something. You might think they had a terribly contagious disease, were the slime of the earth, could be terrorists, or even worse, and were here against the knowledge and permission of the government of the United States.

Don't get me wrong, bring me your tired, your poor, your dregs of the earth and we will stir them into the great American melting pot. From this pot came greats like Oscar Meyer, Dale Barnhart, George Steinbrenner, Regis Philbin, Jennifer Lopez, and our own Jennifer Dougherty.

Our melting pot has creating a lot of interesting mixtures, some great achievers and some big losers. (I'll let you decide which is which!) But when it comes to people who sneak in and expect to stay here by maneuvering the system in a variety of ways so they eventually have to stay: no way...that does not fly with me!

The DMV has every right to deny illegals the privilege of driving if they do not have permission to be here. It is just one way of slipping through the cracks and finding one more way they can work the system in their favor.

As for large corporations hiring mass quantities of illegals to do work that Americans think they are too good to do, maybe some American teens and young adults have forgotten what that melting pot was about.

My ancestors did not come here because they were rich and wanted to get richer. They came here because they were willing to work hard for the things they wanted and that is what these teeming masses are willing to do: work hard. Someone should take away their cell phones and credit cards with no limits to make them work for the things they really want.

Let's turn them into the teeming masses that are willing to work hard for a day's wage to scrape by, not just play money. Then there won't be a need for mass quantities of illegals to do that work. It's the work that always needs to be done, someone has to do it, and it is just a matter of who is willing to do it.

As for the kids behind the counter at the local fast food, there are just as many native born workers who cannot speak the English language properly enough to take a decent order.

So, illegal aliens: hit the road. And not with a Maryland driver's license. We want you out of here. If you are a legalized alien, we are happy to have you here, especially if you are a productive member of society who is willing to learn the English language.

P.S.: I just hate it when you talk behind me in your native tongue then laugh while looking



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