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The Tentacle


September 5, 2012

Into The Fray! Mistake or Brilliance?

Tom McLaughlin

Kuching, Malaysian Borneo – The Republican Convention was broadcast live here over the satellite cable company Astro. It aired from 8 A.M. until noon on CNN International, headquartered in London.

 

Are they really like that? I mean the Mitt Romney family. They come across with such a clean Norman Rockwell image. The perfect husband and wife. The five perfect sons. The five gorgeous wives. The grandchildren, who I swear were hatched.

 

Then along came the Ryan family. Another immaculate clan. Two sons dressed like the Romney boys. I was relieved when I saw them come out on stage at the end with their shirt tails hanging out. “My god they are human,” I said to myself.

 

And all that religion. Between them they could open a Salt Lake City Vatican. Does Paul Ryan really go to confession every week? What does he tell the priest? “Father forgive me. I have sinned. I said gosh darn.” Does he miss Mass at least once every other year to go fishing?

 

And then there is Mr. Romney, who has spent most of his time helping others. One would think he would have no time to govern the State of Massachusetts, preside over Bain Capital, or counsel members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. After watching their body language, truth be told, he did it to get away from her.

 

I realize it is not fair to humorize (my word) the families and their religion. They should be kept out of politics and portrayed only as minor supporting cast members. They must be allowed to attend their schools, churches and places of business in anonymity and privacy free from the prying eyes of the press.

 

However, Mr. Romney and Mr. Ryan, especially Mr. Romney, dragged them into the public eye to convince Americans the Romney- Ryan ticket was really human. Somehow, they got the idea that they had an image as cold as the fish given to Sonny Corleone announcing the death of Luca Brasi.

 

By bringing the families into the fray, Mr. Romney’s sons are now fair game for the scum who publish the tabloids. They are the same ones who printed the pictures of a nude Prince Harry. The children’s backgrounds will be scrutinized for any deviation from their wholesomeness as portrayed at the convention. And they will find something. They always do.

 

Mr. Romney was and is a business man who makes the oxymoronic claim of earning $250 million while helping other businesses succeed. Mr. Ryan is an accountant who can make numbers add up that will erase the deficit and solve unemployment.

 

Mr. Romney showed a serious character flaw by asking his relatives to participate in his quest for the presidency. He doesn’t seem to realize the American people know most families, including his, are not as Walt Disney and vanilla as the images portrayed at the convention.

 

The one thing that did humanize Mr. Romney was Clint Eastwood. This Democrat laughed heartily, as I assume President Obama did, at the antics of this aged NRA warrior. The salty innuendos coupled with the empty chair served to demonstrate that the Romney-Ryan ticket has a sense of humor and can joke around with the rest of us. Although slotted at the worst possible time for the Republicans, Mr. Eastwood made me think, for a brief moment, those guys aren’t so bad after all.

 

…Life is good. . . . .

 



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