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The Tentacle


October 21, 2011

So Much from Subsidies

Patrick Kjellberg

I was watching the ‘fair and balanced’ show the other day and the anchor had a gripe piece about government subsidies. Normally Sean Hannity is making a mountain-out-of-a-mole hill, and I can hear the audience fist pumping and hooting that must be coming from my neighbor’s house.

 

Anyhow, I thought, well maybe, Sean has stumbled across something. It was made pretty clear from the piece how wasteful these subsidies are; in this case it was to educate workers in Florida on how to build and install solar panels.

 

How crazy is that, solar panels in Florida; unfortunately the State of Florida cut its subsidy for solar panels. At least Florida gets how harmful subsidies are, and finally came to their senses and cut that crazy program.

 

So, all those principled conservatives out there who agree we should eliminate those subsidies in pursuit of less government spending and a free consumer-based economy, raise your hand. Of course, cutting subsidies does not come without sacrifice; and, where we can’t cut subsidies, we must be strong and exercise the power of consumer sovereignty. Wow, there is a term that hasn’t been used for a while, but it’s time to take a stand.

 

Now, all of you principled anti subsidy people with your hand in the air, you can put it down now. There are some things you need to do to take back our country.

 

First, print out this article, because you won’t be using the Internet anymore; that is, after all, a huge government subsidy. Sure, there are a lot of private sector companies in the game now making money providing services, employing people and doing all those good things they do; but the Internet started from government funding. So, if you are opposed to the government giving away cake, you, as the principled individual, certainly don’t want to be seen eating cake.

 

Now, I need you to go to your food cupboard and throw out any chips or bagged items that are over two weeks old, as most of that packing technology came from the NASA space program. You may want to strip those radials off the car as the tire technology comes from NASA again. Besides, you’re now not going to drive on the Interstate system anywhere in the country anyway. Eisenhower, government subsidy, ya know.

 

Now, that is just a smidgen off the top of my head. And that is before we even look at the definition of subsidy.

 

Tell me the difference between a subsidy and a tax break; the net effect is the same. Also, how about those big government contracts; that is after all what put Pfizer on the map. So that would rule out tons of medicines, and, of course, the big blue pill. Sorry about that for you aging fellows, but principle is principle, and we all must sacrifice. Stay united and take back our country.

 

Speaking of medicine, that reminds me of indirect subsidies, those under the euphemism of grants, those tricky liberal bureaucrats sliding those subsidies under a Trojan horse called grants.

 

So, this would pretty much rule out so much medicine, you would be better off calling Jack Kevorkian. After ruling out all the subsidies and grants put forward in the name of modern medicine, you probably would be left with bloodletting as a remedy for any illness. But keep the faith; it’s time we take back our country.

 

The bottom line is that we have government to provide to a society those things that are not naturally provided by the private sector, such as law enforcement, public roads, mass transit; and, yes, subsidies in burgeoning industries – medicine, education and those things we deem important and allow us to become a society that we want to become.

 

Which brings us back to square one – that crazy wasteful subsidy to spur a solar industry in Florida. After all, don’t we want clean air and energy that is not supplied by our enemies?

 

By the way, clean air and clean water are things the private sector has never produced.

 



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