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February 20, 2007

A Disease Without a Cure

Maude Franceschina

We need to pull together, we conservatives in America, and support our brothers and sisters suffering from a little understood condition commonly referred to as liberalism.

There is no pharmaceutical company yet working to alleviate this distortion of the mind. I hope that - with some media attention given to the condition - it will be more acceptable to actually seek help for this disorder rather than to try to ignore it and pretend that it is just another world view.

In light of the fact that we, as a nation, have largely ignored this disease, other countries have stepped up to try to help curb the continued spread of this problem. The nations who have been most willing and eager to help to clear the populace of this problem use random acts of violence in attempting to trigger a reorganization of brain matter. 9/11 proved that this approach has limited effect.

I am not sure if it has been determined whether this is a bacterial or viral condition, yet it seems to take hold of individuals who are in close quarters with the afflicted, feeding on confused brain cells which then rapidly begin to mutate.

The brain cells become inbred through some type of airborne connection process resulting from exposure to those suffering from extreme forms of liberalism, sometimes manifesting in the inability to find or use deodorants or shavers.

Usually the "carriers" of the disease are in positions of influence over individuals who have yet to solidify their world views through the maturation process. In some instances drugs or alcohol have been blamed for the random effect on brain cells and critical thinking processes; but this is considered a phantom (look-alike) type disease rather than the true mental infection.

As with many diseases and viruses, this infection has become "intelligent," in that it is able to divert attention from the flaws within the thinking system by rapidly switching to new connections and arguments when taken to task.

It also feeds the mind with multi-syllable words that are used in nearly perfect grammatical expression imitating actual intelligence. The mutated cells trigger spoken key words and phrases to connect with mutated cells of other bodies and have been known to eliminate entire strings of stored information, enabling the cells to rewrite memories of known thoughts, actions and historical data.

At this time, it has become apparent that at least one strain of this disease has become so sophisticated that it can be triggered through many indirect systems. While it is believed that the initial infection must be generated through personal contact, usually repeated and influential, once the infection has taken hold of an individual the cells can be affected through print and vocal means. Once mental maturation has been reached, all may be lost in the absence of a significant medical breakthrough.

There is currently no explanation for the cure rate of sufferers realized through child birth or adoption. A large majority of sufferers are substantially impacted by a change in personal responsibility and brought out of the stupor that liberalism tends to inflict. This cure rate has been most effective for those who have not spent a significant amount of time in government service or education.

The mental affliction is one that looks to its own preservation. Thus, liberals are decidedly pro-abortion, the intent is to avoid possible cure through childbirth.

It is imperative that we begin to eradicate this disease, since allowing it to spread without intervention may be the downfall of humankind. Unfortunately, a symptom of this disease is a hatred of mankind and society, of free speech, a tendency to embrace evil, the willingness to twist facts and misuse science to make these attitudes and actions appear palatable.

We should continue to reach out to our suffering brothers and sisters in love and friendship, and exhibit an understanding of their condition. I do not believe, as the radical Islamic population apparently does, that the disorder cannot be cured by some method other than exploding them to bits. Surely common sense and reason administered daily can prevail.



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